aeternus

I was just entering chapel last week when I was pulled outside to talk by a man who was in a fury. He is a wonderful, prayerful man who is zealous in his activities for the Lord. To me, and to many others, this man is a great inspiration. I gave him my attention while he heaved out in a sigh, “have you heard about Mother Teresa and the article in Time Magazine?”

Well, I was taken aback. If there was an article in Time Magazine about Mother Teresa surely it would be B A D for in my reformed journalistic opinion, nothing good (for the sake of Catholicism at least) can come from such a wretched periodical. (Shame on me for being so completely nasty, but… well you can see I have a long way to go on my road of purgation!)

I had actually heard a brief account of what was in this Time story, so I muttered that I did not read the article, but I was not hopeful because it erred on the side of Atheism. But my friend, this good and righteous man, was so very quick to point out his utter enthusiasm and happiness with the article. Bless his heart, he was so happy to know that even Mother Teresa suffered the Dark Night. He knew, just as many prayerful and spiritual people understand, that the road to heaven is not always lit up as a shiny and sparkley path of glory and rainbows! Indeed, most of the time it is a rough and dark road navigated only through blind faith and courageous trust in God.

This news about Mother Teresa’s darkness gave my friend an even more sincere love and admiration for this great Blessed of Calcutta. Truly, it was wonderful to see the happiness in his face because this man knows and can relate to the torture of a soul lost in this abyss of darkness.

I have been thinking about dear, dear Mother Teresa a whole lot this past week. At first I wanted to read the story about her in Time, but I decided against that (for I am afraid I would not be as forgiving as my friend if I read one bad word about this heroic woman). Instead I spent the week musing on the different aspects of Mother and of her Sisters and the influence they have had on me over the years.

The first time I actually saw, in person, religious Sisters of the Missionaries of Charity was in JFK airport. I was 18 years old and on my way to London with a friend and her family. The airport was packed and there was hardly any room to move about. But in a flash, amidst the flailing throng of travelers I saw their white and blue saris blurred ahead of me. I knew exactly who they were and my whole person just stopped. Stopped dead in my tracks. I was unable to move, unable to speak and immediately tears filled me eyes. I just stood there frozen and starred. It was like getting hit over the head with a brick and you never saw it coming. The beauty before me was tremendous and I knew it deep inside. I was being jostled and bumped about by an anxious scurry around me but I still could not move. Eventually my friend noticed I was no longer walking with her and that there was something amiss. Heading back through the crowd she found me and shook me out of my sweet reverie. I shall never forget that instance of my first encounter…

There have been numerous other encounters since that time. Stories of small miracles, stories of prayer, stories of humility and grace - each tale as beautiful as you can imagine. But the most important one to date occurred this past spring. I was at mass with my children on a Saturday morning when three Missionaries of Charity came and sat a couple of pews ahead of us. After mass was over they came over to my daughter (age 6) and knelt down to her. With great love and affection they looked her straight in the eye and told her she was a beautiful soul. Smiling and patting her little head they told her with beautiful voices that Jesus loved her very much. My daughter was so taken by this, so moved, that she could not stop beaming the most happy smile for the rest of the day. Indeed, there was nothing which could dare extinguish that joy and when it came time for bed she wanted to recount the story to me again and again. In fact, she still likes to recall this event, and each time it is with the same joy. What a blessing! What a great and tremendous blessing! Thank you Jesus for showing your love to this little girl! May the name of the Lord be praised!

So that is what I have tried to think of this week in meditation. I have tried to focus on how great a suffering our dear Mother Teresa endured. She always spoke of Jesus’ suffering in the Garden of Gethsemane as being far more painful than the pain endured during His crucifixion. For in the Garden He suffered eternally in His Spirit. The physical suffering of His torture, though this be of a magnitude unimaginable, did present itself a limit in death. But the suffering in the garden was a suffering for all time. It knows not time, past or future, it is a abyss of suffering for souls which lasts for ever

How great than was Mother’s spiritual suffering. How alone the humble soul felt by not feeling God’s presence. Indeed, her desire to keep loving the poor, her desire to serve them and humble herself to them was all for love of Jesus. There is NO lack of faith in this what so ever, NONE at ALL! Instead it is itself a brilliant paradox. Her faith was TRUE faith. It was not based in feelings or emotions. It was pure, blind, courageous faith!

How much more should we admire her and take her for our example during our own attempts at purification of our egos and temperments. Dear, dear Mother, thank you so much for all you still continue to give us as you lead us to your Jesus. May you be serving Him now as you served Him with us…. AMEN.

Here is a nice little tid bit from the Newswire…

28-August-2007 — ZENIT.org News Agency
Mother Teresa’s Dark Night Unique, Says Preacher VATICAN CITY, AUG. 27, 2007 (Zenit.org).

- Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta’s dark night of the soul kept her from being a victim of the media age and exalting herself, says the preacher of the Pontifical Household. Capuchin Father Raniero Cantalamessa said this in an interview with Vatican Radio, commenting on previously unpublished letters from Mother Teresa, now made public in Doubleday’s book “Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light,” edited by Father Brian Kolodiejchuk, postulator of the cause of Mother Teresa’s canonization.

In one of her letters, Mother Teresa wrote: “There is so much contradiction in my soul. Such deep longing for God — so deep that it is painful — a suffering continual — and yet not wanted by God — repulsed — empty — no faith — no love — no zeal. Souls hold no attraction. Heaven means nothing — to me it looks like an empty place.”

Father Cantalamessa explained that the fact that Mother Teresa suffered deeply from her feeling of the absence of God affirms that it was a positive phenomenon. Atheists, he contended, are not afflicted by God’s absence but, “for Mother Teresa, this was the most terrible test that she could have experienced.” He further clarified that “it is the presence-absence of God: God is present but one does not experience his presence.” Martyrdom Father Cantalamessa contended that Mother Teresa’s spiritual suffering makes her even greater. He said: “The fact that Mother Teresa was able to remain for hours in front of the Blessed Sacrament, as many eye-witnesses have testified, as if enraptured … if one thinks about the condition she was in at that moment, that is martyrdom!

“Because of this, for me, the figure of Mother Teresa is even greater; it does not diminish her.” The Capuchin priest further lauded Mother Teresa’s ability to keep her spiritual pain hidden within her. “Maybe, this was done in expiation for the widespread atheism in today’s world,” he said, adding that she lived her experience of the absence of God “in a positive way — with faith, with God.”

Not scandalous Father Cantalamessa affirmed that Mother Teresa’s dark night should not scandalize or surprise anyone. The “dark night,” he said, “is something well-known in the Christian tradition; maybe new and unheard of in the way Mother Teresa experienced it.” He added: “While ‘the dark night of the spirit’ of St. John of the Cross is a generally preparatory period for that definitive one called ‘unitive,’ for Mother Teresa it seems that it was one stable state, from a certain point in her life, when she began this great work of charity, until the end. “In my view, the fact of this prolongation of the ‘night’ has meaning for us today. I believe that Mother Teresa is the saint of the media age, because this ‘night of the spirit’ protected her from being a victim of the media, namely from exalting herself. “In fact, she used to say that when she received great awards and praise from the media, she did not feel anything because of this interior emptiness.”